George

Oh yes I am Father. Incredibly sincere. So, uh, pffft, am I in?

Priest

The first step would be to familiarize yourself with these texts (brings out a pile of books).

George

Ah hah. You see Father, I'm I'm incredibly anxious to become a member. Um, don't you offer any kind of an express conversion? A quick change?

Roberta

Oh I'm sorry. Father, there's a man waiting in the chapel.

Priest

You may attend to it Sister, oh this is George Costanza. He is interested in joining the church.